Who is your Daddy? Advice on What to Buy for Dad.

Posted on October 22, 2014 by The Angry Unicorn

Did you get anything for the guy who spawned your dumb behind this past Father's Day? Your father, good guy that he is, went to a lot of trouble to create and raise you; from not pulling out, to now elbow dropping you when you were a smart ass teen, to whatever the hell else he does for you.

Don’t be an idiot and get him a tie, he’s already got 20. Don’t be a dummy and get him a lap dance, his spouse will kill him! Get him some cufflinks!

The Pierrefonds set from Bond47 are a great start. A simple set of contrasting semi-circle colors that matches the difference between you and your old man. If you wanna be corny, you could say that wearing those means you always got his back like he had yours. If you really wanna sell the father’s day gift thing, have a donation sent to provide relief for a cancer-stricken kid, like the time he slapped the steak on your black eye that one time you lost a fight.

Maybe your dad is the kind of guy you still see time to time, for poker or blackjack or board games. Then why not get him the Musee Picasso set of cufflinks. It looks like a blue and gold card table making it colorful enough to go well with a lot of weekend wear. Cause sometimes your dad doesn’t want to be all serious and wants to show off. So let him, and tell him how your gift also helped give a kid some major surgery to change their life for the better. “Just like you made my life better” you could tell him before he wonders if you’re about to cry.

But maybe you got one of those smart dads who plays chess and checkers all the frickin’ time. He’ll never beat a master of the game like me, but maybe you wanna put him up to the challenge or remind him of his favorite hobby. Then you can’t go wrong with these cufflinks I came up with called, Get Out, Kasparov! You got a knight, probably your dad, and a pawn, that would be you. As he’s whupping you in four moves again, you could tell him that “thanks to you dad, one day I may become a queen.” Don’t blame me if you say that and he laughs at you.

But seriously, do something for your old man that he’d like, that he’d find kinda cool, and isn’t a Damned Tie! Seriously, you know what that says, that you’re too damn lazy to come up with a better idea or that you don’t even care. 

Posted in dad, father, father's day, gifts for guys, gifts for husbands, gifts for men